Here are some strategies for better communication:

Use and read body language

Talk face-to-face.

Unfold your arms. This telegraphs that you are open, unguarded, and welcoming.

Look at their face. Are their lips open (indicating that they are open and receptive to what you are saying) or closed (indicating that they are less open and/or receptive)?

Are their arms open or closed? How about their and hands? Are their fists clenched or unclenched?

The body will sometimes tell you what words will not.

Use this information to go deeper. Example: I noticed you looked away when I mentioned tightening the budget… what was on your mind?

Use encouraging signals

Nod; say “yes,” or “uh-huh,” or I see…

Marriage experts say that just by making an affirming sound when the other person is talking increases marital satisfaction

Restate what they are saying

Don’t assume you know what they are talking about. Take a time-out mid-conversation to pause the conversation so you can verify you understand.

Make eye contact

Set the scene

Eliminate distractions. Doing this communicates that understanding each other is more important than anything else in the world