Keep reminding yourself that you live in a world that is groaning, waiting for redemption, but remind yourself also that the cross guarantees that the groaning will someday end.

Permit yourself to groan; you have valid reasons to do so. Give yourself to seasons of groaning; it is spiritually healthy to do so. And as you groan, remember that your Lord hears your groaning and responds with tender loving care. Now, it is important to note that most of our groaning is not only spiritually unhealthy; it is spiritually debilitating. We most often groan because we have not gotten our own way or because something or someone has gotten in our way. Often our groaning is little more than verbal pouting. It is a symptom of our continuing desire to be sovereign so as to guarantee that we will get the pleasures, treasures, and comforts that we have set our hearts on. Sadly, so much of our groaning is self-oriented frustration that ends up making us despondent, discouraged, and a bit bitter.

But we have reason to groan because we live in a world that is breaking under the harsh burden of the destructiveness of sin. Every day we are greeted by corporate sin, cultural sin, institutional sin, and individual sin. Sin never has a good harvest. Sin always deceives, divides, and destroys. It always promises what it can’t deliver and delivers things that were not part of the bargain. Sin masquerades as something it is not and can never be. It is the ultimate wolf in sheep’s clothing. It has left both humanity and the surrounding creation broken and crippled.

Think about when we typically groan. We groan when we’re disappointed. We groan when we’re grieving. We groan when we’re in pain. We groan when we’re frustrated. We groan when we feel weak. We groan when we’re exhausted. We groan when things are not the way they are supposed to be. It’s right to groan for the right reason. It’s right to be sad at what sin has done to you and everything around you. It’s good to be frustrated when you’ve allowed yourself once again to be hoodwinked by sin. It’s good to groan at how sin makes marriage difficult and parenting a travail. It’s good to mourn the effect of sin on the church and the workplace, on education and government. It’s good to groan when the spiritual battle has left you tired and wounded. It’s right to groan when you see loved ones trapped in sin’s deceit.

Here’s what is important to understand: your groaning is either anger that you’ve not gotten your way or a cry that God would get his holy, loving, wise, and righteous way. Groaning is either, “Will my kingdom ever come?” or it is, “Your kingdom come.” It is good to stop and examine your groaning and to give yourself to a season of the right kind of groaning. After all, you do live in a groaning place. Paul says it this way in Romans 8:22: “For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in pains of childbirth until now.”

But it’s tempting to avoid groaning, to keep yourself too busy or too distracted to be able to think about your struggle with sin and the brokenness of the world around you. It’s tempting to try to convince yourself that you are okay and the things around you are not that bad. It’s tempting to numb your heart with the physical pleasures of this fallen world. It’s tempting to put on a happy face when you’re not really happy or happy with how you’re doing. It’s tempting to give non-answers or evasive answers when someone asks you how you’re doing. It’s tempting to try to convince yourself to feel good about things that are not good. It’s tempting to work at not groaning.

So, it takes grace to groan over sin internal and external. It’s counterintuitive to do so. At the point of sinning, sin doesn’t look horrible; it looks attractive. When you’re lusting, you don’t see danger; you see beauty. When you’re gossiping, you don’t think about its destructiveness, because you’re carried away by the buzz of carrying a tale. When you are overeating, you don’t see the sin in what you’re doing, because you are enjoying the pleasure of the sights and tastes of the food. When you’re cheating on your taxes, you don’t think about the danger of a heart that has become comfortable with thievery, because you’re caught up in thinking about how you will spend the money gained. Part of the deceitfulness of sin is its ability to make what is destructive appear attractive.

When you are groaning sin’s destruction, you are groaning because you’ve been blessed with eyes that see clearly, a mind that thinks wisely, and a heart that has been made tender by grace. The problem is not that we groan, but that we groan selfishly or we do not groan at all. Grace will make you groan and then will turn your groaning into rejoicing. In your groaning, you rejoice because you know that God meets you in your groaning. The apostle Paul says that God hears and answers even when we are without words with which to groan (see Rom. 8:26–27). You see, we are not just groaning into the air as some cathartic exercise. No, we groan to someone who has invited us to groan and has promised to hear and to answer. We groan to one who is in us, with us, and for us, who has blessed us with life-altering promises and who will not quit working on our behalf until we have no more reason to groan. We groan to one who has already won the victory over everything for which we groan and who will not rest until all his children are experiencing all the fruits of that victory. In this way, our groaning is not selfish anger, but a cry for help to the only one who has the power, authority, wisdom, and grace to come to our aid and give us what we really need. And in our groaning, we confess that too often we groan for the wrong reason.

So, stop and groan. Let your heart feel the burden of the full weight of sin both internal and external. Scan your life, scan your heart, scan your thoughts and desires, scan your words and behavior, scan the struggles of the people around you, scan the world you live in, and find reason to groan. Let sin’s sadness drive you once again to the cross where your Savior groaned aloud on your behalf as he bore the horrible weight of sin. Take time to let sadness sink in so it may lead you to redemption’s celebration, as you remember that the debt has been paid and the ultimate victory over what makes you groan has been guaranteed.

Yes, indeed, it is good to groan.

Reflection Questions

1. Thinking of both the subject of your groaning and its effects, how can you tell whether your groaning is spiritually healthy or spiritually unhealthy?
2. In what ways do you find it challenging to engage with spiritual lament?
3. How could you more effectively groan over your sin, and what spiritual benefits might that offer?

Read Psalm 74, and then use it as a catalyst for writing your own song of lament. Include both private and corporate confession and need.